Stress To Success

Pema Chodron

This past month I had the honor of experiencing a full weekend with Buddhist teacher, author – (see her books) – and delightful speaker, Pema Chodron.  Here’s a couple of tidbits that I learned…

Bourgeois Suffering & Detox Period…

The audience was kept laughing  by this over-70 mother-turn-nun, often about those absurd life situations we all share.

For example, she’d refer to our, “Bourgeois Sufferings” – those moments when we feel that ‘ugh’ sensation come up.

Like when you walk onto a plane and find your in the middle seat between the talker and the fidgeter. (I’m usually the fideter.)

Or the other week I got stuck in 5pm traffic during the closure on I-90.  UGH!

And one that I find often – when my body is holding a difficult yoga posture and all I want to do is get out!

Pema says to use these relatively ‘easy’ sufferings as practice to stay with the experience. She called holding these edges as the “detox periods” – choosing to stay in the pain just as it is, rather than doing that which is habitual such as going into the usual anger, upset, or pull-away.

It is these daily edges that help us build inner muscle necessary in darker times.

We could be at least as wise as a well-trained dog…

Pema encouraged us in our urge of wanting something to be different then what it is, to be “at least as wise as a well-trained dog sitting with great anticipation as a treat rests on its nose“.  STAY! Simply wiggle and wait (that might mean breathe and pause) until given the ‘ok’.  Let yourself be fully open in the anticipation, simply ask,

“What’s Happening Now?’

So there I was last week, doing my yoga on the dock when I found myself “STAYING” in pigeon pose – lying face down – 1 leg bent under me, the other straight behind.

My belly was gurgling and growling and all I wanted to do was get out of it.  Not because I was in pain, I just wanted – OUT.  So I stayed & waited – remembering Pema’s suggestion – to stop in this ‘easy’ bourgeois suffering and see what happens.

Three  more breaths later, I was still like that dog waiting in anticipation -  wanting to pop out so I chose to wait another 3 breaths and yet another.  I stayed and finally asked myself, “What’s Happening Now?”

And then my belly started to talk.

In rolling waves of  sadness my belly spoke of the love for my son.  I had images of my 16 year old son moving out of the house and starting life on his own.  And discovered how much I was missing him!

And yes, even though he has 2 more years in high school, I was in anticipation of the leave ever since he ended his Sophomore year.

My belly was the recipient of the bittersweet anguish.

What would your body say if it knew you would stay & listen?

Our bodies talk all the time – when do you listen?

“What’s Happening Now?” It is this question that arises in my session as your supported in holding that posture that you want to just pop out of .  It’s  the one that isn’t really physically difficult, but you just ‘don’t like for some reason’.

Staying at the edge of ‘therapeutic discomfort’ (another Pema phrase) – you get to move through and discover what is truly  ‘gripping’ you.

What’s Happening Now?  Try a session today…

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